Masculinity - the inverse of feminity?

On Duty

A man’s evolution can only happen when he begins to cultivate a true sense of masculinity that is related to who he is as an individual. Reinventing the masculine identity is not making yourself more feminine; rather, it is striving to become you.  Viewing yourself in an inverse relationship with femininity will not change a thing. [Emphasis Mine] Alec A @ http://thefbomb.org/2010/10/redefining-masculinity/

I really dislike generalizations and stereotypes.  Most of us recognize generalizations paint too wide a picture and inhibit understanding of the individual or group being generalized.  While, once in a while, they are handy as a basic survival tool, we get trapped in them.  One of the traps is the us/them, right wrong aspects of them.  Generalizations often assume opposites are the truth and nothing can exist in the middle.

"Men are the opposite of women." 
"Men are from Mars... " 
"All that guys want is sex." 
"She must be part guy because of how she goes for sex."* 
"Unless it is a competition, men wont care." 

Men are not entirely the opposite of women.  We are all multi-dimensional universes with each direction having its own spectrum of behavior.  Many of these dimensions have nothing to do with gender.  It is our place on each dimension spectrum that defines who we are.  As a man, some of those are gender based and they make me who I am.  I am not the opposite of women, nor the same.  I am Karl and I am the man I am and there are none exactly like me.
 
* A woman told me this about her friend and colleague who is married, has an open relationship, and told her she has made out with a few colleagues.  

Who gets past the feminist bouncers?

Hear Me Roar (HMR) focuses on men, masculinity, masculism, and the role, identity, rights, and perception of men in society.  This focus on the masculine gender is fine, but HMR must also take time to look at feminism and the role, identity, rights, and perception of women in society.

Recently resigned Alaska gov Sarah Palin publicly proclaimed her feminism.  Many in the political world wondered what that meant.  Can someone as conservative as Palin be a feminist?

This question of who gets to self-proclaim as feminist was posed to a number of feminist writers and theorists at Slate.com.  The responses are interesting.  Some agree that Palin can claim the identity, others argue against it for various reasons.  The first argument against is that while Palin is a product of feminism, she has done nothing to promote feminist causes.  The second draws an even harder line in the sand, Palin's hard pro-life/anti-choice/anti-abortion stand absolutely keeps her out of the group.  I highly recommend you read the article. 

So, what is HMR's stand on a feminist litmus test?  Undecided.  HMR has concerns about exclusive clubs that openly discriminate, even to those sympathetic to the group's causes but with differing ideas or backgrounds.  On the other hand, no group should allow someone in who will actively and purposefully damage the group and the cause.  My questions for any group are:

• How do you handle differing opinions from group members?  
• Do you listen to them, but do nothing about them?  
• Do you placate or cave in to them?  
• Do you toss them out of the group?
• Which individuals or groups are definitely persona non grata?

As for Palin's desire to take on the identity of feminist - check her motives.   HMR believes she intends to mock, damage, belittle, and reduce the importance of the movement.  The feminist movement is in a mine field with this one.  If they accept her, how do they control her?  If they refute her, how will the group's identity change after rejecting a woman of power from membership?  Good luck.

On a side note, HMR supports the core feminist values and causes.  As with all groups, fringe interests arise that test support both within and outside of the group.  That is worth many more blog posts.